Ray the Wise
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Stuck in the beer freezer at Ralph's. Pinned under crates of sh*tty beer. Send help. Sent with my Blackberry Storm.
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Wait I think it's actually Ralphs. Like not the possessive form but the form where there's apparently many Ralphs. Either way, send help. Sent with my Blackberry Storm.
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Oh, never mind. I managed to get out by myself. But now I reek of Dos Equis - Or, as I like to call it, Doggie Piss.
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XD
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Maybe.
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What the hell is going on in Middle East ?
Ray the Wise replied to Semper Fidelis's topic in [EN] Off Topic
That's the sound of my concern. I usually eat crackers and breathe heavily when I'm concerned about world events. Which has been happening A LOT lately. -
Happy 2013 to all the party people. Hopefully this will be a year during which I wreak more havoc than usual.
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haha! anyway IDK!
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That's the end result of trying to catch Kony!!
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lol
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I used to have a diorama of that time when Meryl Streep attempted to get away with a hit-and-run in a parking lot but then her car got stuck and she got confronted by onlookers and went berserk, attacking one of them with a pair of shoes. I believe it was 1/24th scale or something. Very detailed and all - it even had those little miniature doll shoes. But then I sold it in a yard sale to a woman who looked suspiciously like Meryl Streep wearing those huge Lady Gaga hooker sunglasses. Talk about someone who would rather buy everyone's silence than accept they've made a mistake and move the f*ck on.
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What the hell is going on in Middle East ?
Ray the Wise replied to Semper Fidelis's topic in [EN] Off Topic
*strange heavy breathing noise, like someone breathing with a mouthful of masticated crackers* -
Busy with sh*t.
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Well that's even better. That means the position is open. I decided to rethink my approach. You can't spell Vice Squad without Miami Vice - well, actually, you can, but it's not my point. My point is screw muscle cars - I want a white convertible Testarossa with a Florida license plate that reads "WISE 1". It's more my style. I've also got a couple pastel suits I can bring from home.
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Which part? I guess the fedora might be a little over the top.
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Is there any room in there for Detective Ray Alfonso Wise of the Vice Squad? I'm looking for a place where I can virtually wear a fedora, drive a muscle car aggressively, kick down doors, carry a bigass shotgun and yell. I made up the Alfonso part, by the way. It's my cop name. Oh and if I can't have the shottie, I'll settle for Dirty Harry's 44 Magnum. You know what? Actually I'd like to have both. And also a Thompson model 1928 with a drum mag, those things are wicked.
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Why, thank you! You want to make them awesomer? Try reading them in your head with my smooth baritone voice. Theeeere you go. Ain't that just one degree more awesome than it was?
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By the way it was The Wicker Man, not The Omen. The Omen had Julia Stiles in it. Oh the things I'd do to her.
